Wednesday, May 04, 2011
If you are seeking to change any aspect of your life be it improved health, weight loss, better employment, happier relationships or anything for that matter, the first step is to become very clear with yourself. It sounds simple and quite logical but I promise you, most people don't take the time to concretely set their intention. Heck, most people don't usually give it enough conscious thought to exactly pin down what it is that they genuinely want. It takes time and awareness to dig into our feelings and desires far enough to hit pay dirt. Itís easy to say, ďIím unhappy,Ē but what EXACTLY would it take to make you happy? Often as we explore this question we find what we truly desire isnít as cut and dried as what we had originally thought. In fact, my experience is that it is usually just the tip to a massive iceberg contingent on many things changing. Chunk it down and change the easiest habits and patterns first, then slowly work up to the larger more challenging ones.
If you are yearning to make lasting change, take out a pad and pen and begin to explore your desire as you can define it right now. Write at the top of the page, " The change I want to make is________." Then sit back and think about that for a few minutes and IF it seems to be an accurate statement, move down a line or two and begin a list of all reasons you want this change. How would it positively impact all the different areas of your life? How would it feel to have actualized this? What freedoms would it afford you? Would it positively impact those close to you, your community, your state, the country? Thoroughly explore ALL or as many areas of your life that you can think of; things that would improve if this change were a fact. What is likely to happen during this process is that you will find yourself redefining your desire, honing it into a sharper, more precise desire. The end results will be one of clarity, way more awareness and a sureness, much brighter than you ever had around this change before. You are now ready to begin creating a game plan to move you in the direction of your goal. This is when the real work begins. Often there are people in our lives who, consciously or not, will be resistant to our making these changes. Stay true to thyself! Part of your plan needs to take these people into account and work on a couple responses that you will use as their defenses arise. Something kind, clear and reassuring works best. Remind them that you are your own master/creator and that when it comes to your personal life, body, employment, relationships you really do know what feels best FOR YOU. They are certainly welcome to their opinions and you appreciate their input but in the long run, you will and must remain loyal to what your heart dictates. Of course, the same holds true for them. Stay your course! Being true to your heart's desires seems like a no-brainer however, old habits die hard. We truly are creatures of habit and in order to implement permanent change we have to change EVERYTHING around the way we have previously addressed this aspect of ourselves, otherwise nothing will change. After all, we canít keep behaving, thinking and feeling the old same way and expect new and different results can we? Change takes awareness, consistency, and most of all, conviction. You have to want this with all your heart and soul and when you genuinely do...real and permanent change is yours!
Don't ever worry about setbacks...they are natural and change takes practice and time to perfect. Again, stay the course! Resist being self-condemning at all costs. It is a complete waste of your precious time and energy. Make appointments in your day runner to work on this change whether it be workouts 3 times/wk., time to cook healthier meals, time to perfect your resume for future circulation, couples therapy, time to talk to a Spiritual Advisor, sitting down with an accountant and hammering out a budget or whatever will help you move this change into your reality. Although you will begin to see small improvements immediately, allow 3 months for the really large improvements to show up. Rome wasnít built in a day and we arenít going to implement lasting change overnight. Be patient, committed and true to your endeavor. The end results will shock and amaze you and all the persistence will most definitely pay off. Happy mind, body and spirit fitness to all.