Friday, November 24, 2006
The Theme of the Day ... "Lighten Up On Yourself!"
I have noticed over the years that we are usually our own worse critics, and on occasion, our own worse enemies. I recently heard a very good explanation for this, and for me, it is always important to know what is at the core of things. It helps me to make a decision whether to embody it as a belief I now choose to hold or to release it forever. There are some subjects that I find myself having to release over and over, but I am hopeful that given time, I will eventually let them go once and for all.
It has been my observation that I am far from alone in this. While listening to a recent Abraham CD, I heard an angle on this "beating yourself up" topic that really made sense to me. From a very young age, most of us began to link the positive response we got from doing something that seemed to please our parents to the negating of our own emotional guidance. We felt that regardless of how it made us feel, it was more important to make ?them? feel good. Before long, we were jumping through as many of their hoops as we could find to jump through, because our self-worth was becoming intertwinded in their approval of our behavior. The boomdoggle grew even more intricate as we began to lose our connection to who we really are and lost touch with the fact that it is our emotional guidance that is THE greatest tool we possess in this time/space reality. It allows us to know whether we are moving toward what is good for us or we are moving away from our good.
We then proceeded to go to school, where very simlar behavior strategies were in place, and so we continued to jump through our teachers? hoops, our coaches? hoops, our principals? hoops and on and on it went. All the while we were learning that we were, in fact, failures ... yes, failures ... because there is no way possible that we could jump through enough hoops to keep all these people happy. Keeping anyone at all happy, except oneself, is completely impossible in any case. The only person that you can keep ?anything? is you ... period. As we found ourselves failing over and over again, our self-worth took hit after hit. The final outcome ... an adult was produced who is in constant criticism of themselves and never feels as though they are good enough. That was me ... how about you?
Here is the really good news. All of that can be wadded up and thrown into the closest garbage can ... it's simply that ... garbage. This is one of those topics, however, that I personally have to keep throwing away, because if I'm not careful, I find myself right back there putting myself down and putting other?s feelings ahead of my own. I am gradually learning to gently say, "oh look, there I go again, silly me, I know better than to do that.? I know that I am becoming aware of when I do this quicker and quicker all the time.
One thing is absolutely true ... nothing is more important than that I feel good, and beating myself up is moving away from all that is good and for my highest and best. We are all loved, adored and considered unique and wonderful in the eyes of our Creator. We are, in fact, our Creator incarnate, and so to say we are treasured is an understatement ... we are all precious beyond measure. So, lighten up on yourself and try to be gentle with yourself. All is well ... very, very well. Blessings.